Toast

Well today we got our first snow! A perfect day to go sledding, maybe it kinda melted in the middle of the day. Regardless, it's still cold and a perfect day to sit back have a cup of Hot Chocolate, Coffee, Cider, tea, whatever you prefer, (maybe all four) and have some toast. That's what I wished I would have done, but I had to go to Driver's Ed. POOP!!!!
Anyway what I wanted to say was that Toast is very important to me. It's one of my favorite snacks. It's AWESOME 'cause you have it with any beverage anytime of the year. My Speech next week is demonstrating how to make toast. Not every human can make good toast but THIS human can!

Step 1- Pick bread mostly on personal preference

Step 2- Put it in the toaster (don't worry it gets more complex) Once again you can have it burned, lightly toasted or it's-pretty-much-still-bread-but-a-smidgen-of-crunch-so-it's-toast.

Step 3- The millisecond it pops out get your butter and spread it, then melt it on the bread

Step 4- Jam it up with whatever you prefer, and remember less is more. You do not need a whole lot. It's like in Kindergarten when you'd glue things and the teacher would say, "Just a little dab will do ya." However you do want it spread evenly and cover most of the bread.

Step 5- Put cinnamon and sugar on, with good balance of sugar and cinnamon. Too much cinnamon, YUCK. Too much sugar, yum at first then UGH in five minutes. Make sure the cinnamon and sugar is almost melted into butter. Once again "A little dab will do ya."

Step 6- Don't be too eager to eat your prise. Eat the crust first and then work your way to the middle, 'cause that's the best part. Savor it.

See? That's how you make good quality Toast. It's a very special item. You can also have it with eggs, or put bacon and lettuce and tomato on it and you'll get something the Americans like to call the famous BLT. Toast is the best!!!!! Hopefully with my tips, you can it even better! I'm planning on majoring in Toast.

P.S. When your camping make it over the fire and get the lines checkered, it's real fun!

The Lord of the Remote

One remote to rule them all,

One remote to use,

One remote to bring them all

And all the buttons bind them.

This is the story of the universal remote (the shorter version)......

For years countless people speculated the existence of the universal remote. Some believed, others didn't. Until finally it just became a joke. Sure there was a "universal" remote for the television, sadly it did not, in fact control the universe. Searches began to find the universal remote. Some tried to make one one their own, however, all these attempts failed. Eventually the people began to despair at the thought that was no universal remote nor would there ever be. Until, one ordinary person made a extraordinary discovery.

One day Toby Sniggab was wandering out in forests near his home and he came across a remote in the woods.

"This is peculiar," he said. "I wonder what it does?" Some part of him, perhaps the left part, told him to that it would not be wise not to pick up the remote. For a moment he hesitated, but fortunately he picked it up. (Why was it fortunate? Because if he didn't then you wouldn't have a story to read) Thinking that maybe if he pressed a button it would tell him what the remote controlled, so he pressed pause, and the whole world froze.

His eyes grew wide at his discovery, "I've found the universal remote!" After the initial reaction of excited he soon thought it over, "What am I going to with it? What if the wrong people find out and want it to? They'd probably kill me for it! I should go to the wise Garndorf for help!" So off he ran with the remote in his hand to Garndorf's house.

As he approached Garndorf's house, Garndorf was out getting his mail. His head was looking inside the mailbox and his hand was halfway inside. Toby ran up and tapped him on the shoulder.

"Garndorf! I have something exciting to tell you." Garndorf didn't move.

"Garndorf? Come on! It's a fairy tale your not supposed to die!" Once again Garndorf didn't move. "ARGHH!!!! Why aren't you moving?!!?" He was just about to strike Garndorf with the remote when he remembered that he still had the world on freeze. So he pressed play and Garndorf finally moved.

They both went inside and Toby told Garndorf about the remote. Garndorf informed Toby that there was a Evil Lord that wanted the remote and was always looking for it. "You must destroy it!" Garndorf said.

"But where? How?" asked Toby.

"You must go to the remote factory and cast the universal remote back into the smelter. Only there can it be destroyed."

"I know I must do this, but I can't on my own," Toby sighed.

"No you most certainly can't!" Exclaimed Garndorf, "You'll need help. Especially because the Evil Lord will eventually find out and send his villainous Dorks after you."

After a while of talking they decided to create a band of loyal friends and family to accompany them. The group included Sam, Toby's gardener; Perry and Mippin, Toby's cousins; Stepper (actually that's just one of his many names) a friend of Garndorf who turns out to be a King; Limli, an elf; Gegolas, a dwarf; and finally Boredomear, just some random dude they found that wanted to go who was bored with his life. (hence his name) They called their group The Fellowship of the Remote.

Well I'm sure you can guess what happened, and to make this a lot shorter than three ginormous books, we'll cut things down. They eventually separated after a fight between the fellowship of the remote and the Dorks and soon only Toby and Sam were left with task they originally set out to accomplish.

Toby and Sam with the help of Cougher, their guide, who turned out to be not-so-great and betrayed them, arrived at the remote factory. (also Cougher was very attached to remote, because he owned it before and called it his "priceless") By this time Toby was starting to grow very fond of the remote and didn't want to give it up. When he reached the Smelter he debated on whether or not to throw the remote in and destroy or to keep it for himself. Before he could decided (he had Decision Making deficit disorder) Cougher came and stole the remote from him. Cougher was so happy that he jumped for joy, and accidentally fell into the smelter screaming, "Oooooooh Snaaaaaaaap!" all the way down. Until SPLAT he, and the remote melted. Ending the reign of the Evil Lord and restoring peace. And well, you guessed it, everyone lived happily ever after.... except the bad guys.

By the way....

HAPPY THANKSGIVING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
hope you have a good day eating food, but most importantly remembering and honoring what your thankful for, that's the most important part and don't forget it!!!!!

I never understood why

I never understood why,

My siblings did what they did.

It all so strange to me,

After all, I was the youngest kid.

I never understood why,

They had so much homework to do.

Or why they complained about it so much,

I mean, wasn't it easy stuff to do?

I never understood why,

They always went out at night.

And then slept all through the morning,

Something definitely was not right.

I never understood why,

They didn't hang out with Mom and Dad.

Didn't they know how fun they were?

I guess they didn't realize, how sad.

I never understood why,

They often stayed after school.

Missing out Mom's cooked dinner?

It was almost like breaking a rule.

I never understood why,

They never played the right way,

No toys, stuffed animals or anything!

How did they survive everyday?

I used to never understand at all,

but now I most certainly do.

Sunday Lunch

So this was our guest this week a dinosaur, and he ate A LOT of salad.... as you can see.... (the liquidy stuff is salad dressing)

Dun Dun Duuun!!!

As I walk further down the hall, the laughter and chatter of the other hallway deceases. The busyness and light mood of the hallway disappears as well and is replaced with darkness and dismay. Instead of hearing happy conversations, there is silence. The people are replaced with nothing. The hall turns ominous, foreboding and appears endless. I slowly make my way down, each step is reluctant to go any further. I feel like my hands and feet are shackled in heavy iron chains dragging me to a place I do not want to go. As I travel down the dismal hallway, I see freedom, a set of stairs going down, to take me away from this dreaded place. I contemplate the risk of freedom. Should I go down the stairs and be free of this turmoil? Or should I continue going where I know I need to go? As I creep closer to the door that I despise to enter, the stairs look more and more liberating. I want to run down those stairs to be free of all my misery, but before I know what's happened, I've walked in the door of despair.
.....At least that's what I feel like when I walk to room 201.

NEW WINTER SPORT!

Wanna know what the new winter sport is?
Most people will like it, it doesn't involve running around outside freezing, in fact it's quite the opposite. The sport is reading.... at least that's what I consider it to be. Why winter? Isn't that what winter is all about? Getting into your PJ's at seven, hopping in bed, pulling up the covers to travel to another land by your imagination. (maybe even a cup of Hot Chocolate or Cider... mmm) Then after that just going to bed. Think about it. Exercising your mind without leaving the warmth of your bed! How cool is that! Doing something relatively healthy (except the Hot Chocolate/Cider part) without moving anything except your eyes. If it weren't for homework (UGH!) I'd read every night. It could even be an Olympic sport. How? You could get people to read then instead of being, "How fast you read" or "how well you comprehend what you read" it could be, "How much fun you had reading" 'cause that's really what reading (as well as any sport) is all about, to have fun. You could get a fun monitor. And if you lost, it wouldn't matter 'cause you had fun! That's what I think anyway......
P.S. Yes, for all you tea and Coffee drinkers you can read and have coffee and tea, just as well as any other hot beverage... it has to be hot... it's winter, you don't drink lemonade.

Halloween Costume tips

Alright so I do know that, yes, Halloween is passed, but you can still use these tips, if you remember them and if you do but next Halloween I'll give you brownie points, if you remember that I'll give you brownie points if you remember these tips.

• Tip 1: You have to be able to search and to search long and hard. Sometimes to best of costumes are in the bottom of your closet. You have to look and learn to ask for things. Having lots of friends with variety of fashion styles helps a lot, but if you don't, you can always go to the Good Will. (maybe get some friends there) However, if you don't find anything at the Good Will AND you don't have any friends, well, there's not much I can do for ya, except maybe ask some enemies for clothes.
• Tip 2: Along with searching for things you have to be able to settle for less. You won't always find the exact thing, but you CAN always find something that close enough that works.
• Tip 3: If all of the above don't work, you have to accept defeat. In which case you can go with what you got, or find something else to be. If you don't have one element of a certain costume, like not having boots for a pirate costume, just go with out. Although if it's a critical item, it's not going to work. If your going to be a Cowboy and you don't boots or a hat, it's not gonna work for you, you should go as "Look, I was trying to be a Cowboy, but my boots and hat from kindergarten don't fit and this is the only other thing I got."
• Tip 4: It is absolutely essential to have the attitude of whatever you are. Your costume is an absolute FAILURE if you can not play the part. If you're a pirate you can't walk or talk like yourself, you have to walk and talk like a pirate. If your a Cowboy but you ain't good at that whole accent thing you can't be a Cowboy Partner. Once you get into that costume you are that thing until you take it off. All kinds of costumes and Halloweens are ruined every year because people fail to act like their character. It does not work people, you can't do it. So don't be a pirate if you can't BE a pirate. It's all about attitude.
• Tip 5: Be creative. Don't do what every else does. Don't be the normal vampire, go against the gain. Also go against the normal stereotype, when I was a pirate did you see a eye-patch? NO! because it's such a cliche pirate thing. There were probably A LOT of pirates without peg legs, eye-patches, and hooked hands. So think for yourself, don't let other people tell you what to do. It's your Halloween be who YOU want to be, don't follow the crowd. I know you can be creative. It's not hard. Go as your Mom if you have to, that's creative and easy. You just say, "Hey Mom can I borrow some clothes?" I don't care! Just something, anything outside the norm.

......So I hope you listen to my tips and get ready for Halloween for next year so you don't have to throw together a costume at the last minute.... oh and HAVE FUN!!!

Pirates!!!!

Black snow boots that barely fit: free

Black pants that you only bought for band concerts that always get tons of dog hair on them: freeish

Red Sash, vest and bandana borrow from your neighbor: free

Belt from someone in your family: free

Shirt from your Dad: free

Duct tape sword and sheath: free

Being a Pirate for Halloween:priceless..... okay so maybe the whole thing was some-what free but hey, you get the idea

We are the Pirates that got some attitude, we just stand there and look real piratety

And if you ask us to do anything we'll just tell you, "We got attitude"

Ne're mess with a pirate! ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!