L.P.M. (Lame Poetry Monday): Week III

The Hunter and Hunted

I am the hunter.
I silently watch my prey.
I wait quietly to strike.
I watch his every move,
And I wait.
Then I waylay into my prey.

But he is watching me,
With a million more eyes.
And he has a way of escaping,
Death's gripe countless times.

So I leave,
But then I return.
For I am the Hunter,
And I do not give up.
I sneak more quietly.
I move more softly.
I attack more swiftly.
I ready my weapon,
And I let him have it.

My aim is perfect.
I have struck dead center.
I watch my opponent,
My nemesis,
My enemy,
My hate,
Drop.
Down,
Down,
Down,
He goes.
And moves no more.
And I the hunter,
Have won.
I the hunter,
Have killed the fly!

Lame Poetry Monday: Week II

I don't know how to tell you

I don't know how to tell you,
But you have a booger in your nose.
I cannot help but stare,
As it moves to and fro
Whenever air blows.
I think it wanted to leave
The cramp confines of the nose,
But on the way out,
It got stuck on your nose hairs,
Doomed to cling and wait.

I don't know how to tell you,
But you have something on your face.
A forgotten piece of food perhaps?
Maybe you were "saving it for later,"
Though I really doubt that's true.
It probably decided,
That it didn't want to be eaten.
That it would rather spend its days,
Perched upon your cheek.

I don't know how to tell you,
But you have a stain upon your shirt.
In a spot that makes it hard,
To deter your eyes away.
Maybe you spilled coffee,
Or you were playing in the dirt.
What ever the cause,
I won't know
How you got that on your shirt.

I don't know how to tell you,
All these things I've said.
So I'll just sit and smile,
Pretending everything's okay.
Because I
Honestly,
Truthfully,
Sincerely,
Don't know how to tell you,
So I won't.

Lame Poem Mondays

Yesterday my sister established "Lame Poem Monday" for all us bloggers. The idea is that sometimes we have to get it out of our system with a poem. Regardless of how well-written it is. So here is my kick-off poem to "Lame Poem Mondays"

Math

If there is one thing,
I don't understand
It's math.

Find Y.
Y do I care?

Who cares what x is?
eXcuse me, but I don't care.

How fast is Johnny traveling?
Only police care about that.

Find the measures of the missing arc.
Look in the bible if you want to know.

How many feet in 23 meters?
Enough to make it 23 meters.

If you start on the 10th floor, go up 3 floors, then down 5, up 2 more then down 8, what floor are you on?
Ask the elevator boy, not me.

If there are fifteen kids in Mrs. Schulerizers class and she makes 30 cookies how many cookies per kid?
She's the teacher, you ask her for help.

If only they would leave us alone,
why do we have to know?
The world has got enough problems,
why add more to solve?

Indiana Jones and the Countless Escapes

Last Friday I watched Indiana Jones and the Raiders of the lost Ark, maybe you've seen it. Not only does it have an mouthful of a title, but an eyeful of effects and stunts. If you've ever seen Indiana Jones you know what I'm talking about. This guy is amazing. He fights large masses of people by himself twice, finds the ark in a pit of snakes, get traps and escapes with his girl, fights a guy nearly three-times his sized, saves himself and his girl from being blown up, fights a guy after he's been shot in the arm, climbs under a moving car (after he's been shot in the arm), climb aboard a Nazi submarine, saves him and his girl from "the wrath of God", and makes it safely home to Washington D.C. and has a drink with his girl. Whew! As you're watching those kinds of movies, you're probably thinking—like I was—no way this is possible. You can't survive that many close calls. Well, everything you thought is about to change because you can.

1 Corinthians 10:13
No temptation (or trials) has seized you except what is common to man. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted (or tested) beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted (or tested) he will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it.

See? We're all Indiana Jones, we can, because of God, get out of anything. God won't let you face anything that beyond your ability to endure. So if you, like Indiana, and have to fight a 250 pound muscle freak, you can't say, "Oh God! I can't fight him! Make him go away or something." God says, "Nope. You can do it. If you couldn't I wouldn't have let it happen. You have to trust me." And if you're stuck in a pit full of snakes and there's no way out, God will provide you with a way out. (maybe by smashing down an Egyptian god statue)
God always provides a way out, an escape. He also doesn't give you anything you can't handle. Have we got that down? This is important stuff. In fact, I would, If I were you, —which I'm not which might be a good thing I dunno— memorize this verse.
Gasp! memorize? Did she say memorize? Like Sunday school memory verse memorize? Yep. Here's why if you're in a situation where you think, "I can't do this." 1 Corinthians 10:13 will pop into your head and you'll think, "Oh yeah I can." So that means, no more excuses! (Dang it!) And if right now you're thinking, "I can't memorize that verse." Look again at what the verse says. Besides, if kids who can't even read can memorize verses, you can too.
One more thing, the first part of the verse basically says that whatever we face, other people have faced it too. You're not the only one that's been tempted to steal cookies from the cookie jar (terrible I know). Others have gone through the exact same thing. So there's can be no, "Woe is me! No one else has gone through this mess like I have! Boohoo!" Pretty much what this verse does, is stop people from making ridiculous excuses.
And if you're still thinking,"This is impossible! I can't be like Indiana Jones and escape from everything! It's all made up!" Well there's plenty of examples in the bible:

• Israelites and the Red sea
• David and Goliath
• Gideon and the Midianites
• Samson and all the lions and such he killed
• Esther and Israelites
• Paul and his escape from jail
• Paul and the bite from the serpent that he didn't die from
• Paul and the shipwrecks (weren't there three?)
• Peter and the basket
• Joshua and Jericho

......Anyway, you get the idea, just read the entire bible, there are a lot more examples. So just as a sum up: Nothing you have face isn't anything new or different that any other person before you. God will never give you anything you can't handle, he's always with you too. God always provides you with an escape. But not always robust theme music when you do, unfortunately.

Girl VS Sprinkler

I had a fight today, sadly I must report that I lost. But I'm sure you want to here the story. I went to water my neighbor's lawn, because I house-sit for her, and when I went over there the sprinkler came alive and squirted me without mercy. I was forced to retreated. However, as much as I wish that was true, it (of course) is not. It has to do with my stupidity rather than the sprinkler's brutality.
The first part is true, I went to water my neighbor's lawn. Normally, I would go turn OFF the sprinkler set it in a new area then turn it on again. Recently, I witnessed a new—and seemingly easier— way to perform this task, by bending the hose. When you bend the hose, as most of you know, it stops the water from flowing. So I went to the front-yard bent the hose, and no water came out.
Now for a little background information, the sprinkler in the front-yard, when you turn it on, sprays water in a circle simultaneously. The sprinkler in the back-yard is the one the sprinkler dance comes from, it goes it a circle spraying water at various times. Now back to the story.
So I bend the hose down, no water. I move the sprinkler, I encounter problem. I am very close to the sprinkler head, the moment I let go I will get drenched. So I solve the problem, using what's in my head, I reach as far as I can, grab the hose with my free hand, bend it, let go with my other hand, no problem. Finally, I was far enough away from the sprinkler head that I wouldn't get wet, so I let go. Now I went to the back-yard.
As I headed over to the back-yard I thought, "This sprinkler's going to be no problem." Because most of the time you can stand behind it and not get wet at all. Isn't it amazing how deceivingly simple things can become? I also noticed something else, I had an audience, my neighbor's neighbor was outside watering his lawn. I tried to ignore it, so bent the hose and set it down.
That's where my mistake was, the sprinkler head was pointed straight towards me. Either one of two things happened(or both) 1) It didn't register in my mind, sprinkler head toward me. In my head it was like, "The sprinkler head is straight towards me, that's nice. Wait, what?!?"
or 2) The hose was slippery and it fell from my hands. It doesn't really matter what happened, the point is, it did, and I was sprayed.
Nevertheless, about 95% from my waist down, on my front was soaked, drenched, water-logged, whatever you wish. So I did what I normally do in situations like that, I laughed. My sole audience member laughed too, I think. Afterwards I walked home. Thankfully no one was out because it looked like my bladder had reached the maximum level of its capacity and therefore exploded all the contents out, if you know what I mean.
So there's the story. I'm not really sure if it has a moral or not, though if it does I sure you're smart enough to decode it yourself.

WALL-E

So I like to watch movies. And the one question that always gets me is, "Did you like—name whatever movie—? It takes me a long time to come up with an answer. I have to process movies, that process takes about as long as a dial-up computer would take to download a youtube movie. So now I'm going to process movies via blogging, since that's the best way for me to express and process things. And you won't have awkward silence for two hours. The first film, I'm glad to report I will be critiquing is WALL-E. I won't go into details about the synopsis of the film, that takes too long, and hard for most film since you don't want to give anything away, and if you want to know look it up on yahoo movies.

• Acting: The acting for this movie is hard to critique since it's animated. Nonetheless it was flawless. When WALL-E was sad, you knew he was sad. When he was scared, you knew he was scared, even though the only way for you to tell his emotions was by those big, binocular shaped eyes.

• Filming: How should I start with this? The animation was beautiful, I was often had my mouth a gape and eyes gawking at the incredible scenes that created. It would be a wonderful film to watch on an IMAX screen, since a lot of the scenes swoop in and out. The scenes in space are unbelievable. Let's just say when WALL-E says "Woah!" you will too.

• Script: There isn't much of a script in this movie. Not because it's terrible, but because there simply isn't one. The story-telling is done through actions not words. And as we all know actions speak louder than words and it certainly does in WALL-E.

• Plot: The plot in WALL-E is very simple, easy to follow, and flows very nicely, being mostly a children's film. However, there is a hidden, well not hidden, rather blatantly obvious message in the film, unlike a lot of Pixar films. It's a very thought-provoking movie with a message. A lot of times I don't like movies with messages, sometimes it doesn't work and I would prefer to decide for myself what I want to do about about our planet, but in WALL-E it works and I like it a lot.

• Other: I'm not sure there's a whole lot more to add. Expect BE CAREFUL you'll fall in love with WALL-E and for some strange reason start to care about a animated robot.

Well, that's about it. I would strongly encourage you to go see WALL-E. Even though it's supposed to be children's film it might be a little slow for some children and adult. If you fall asleep in most action flicks then you'll probably fall asleep in WALL-E. It reminds me of a whole bunch of PIXAR's short film in a full length film.